Does anyone else feel "Blue" in October?

It's not like I don't have a calender... I shouldn't be so surprised but I am.
Every year I get slammed by this massive depression out of nowhere and can't shake it or explain it until it passes. In the meantime, I'm in HELL.

I wonder:

• Why am I here?
• Why don't my friends return phone calls?
• Why don't I have more money?
• Why don't I have a better job?
• Why can't I find a boyfriend?
• Why? WHY? Why?! Waaaaahhhhhh!

Then I remember: Halloween is my favorite holiday but I have no one to go trick or treating with. I am supposed to be a grown-up. Suck it up. Go to work. Move on.

Then I also remember, I have a birthday coming up (more depression --> I'm getting OLD!!!!) and unless you are turning 1-7, 16, 21, 30, 50, 75, or 100, NO ONE WILL THROW YOU A PARTY! You have to do it yourself. Be a grown-up. Move on.

If I got off my behind and went for a walk or did some exercise I would feel better but the ONLY thing getting me out of bed is the threat of losing my job.

I didn't used to feel this way. September and October were great for me because I LOVE Indian Summer. The fall clothes always fit my curvier figure. The colors flatter my skin. Boots are stylish AND sensible! The air is breathable and everything is crisp and full of rich color. Instead of the bleached pastels from the end of summer; gold, red and orange leaves are on the trees and the sun hangs lower creating amazing sunrises and sunsets.

The moon seemed fuller too.

I know that I get "blue" because:

• I have a "lunar" cycle that tends to skip after a time zone change. (went on vaca with the fam in august again, Doh!)
• My car insurance AND rent AND school loans are all due within a week of each other in October.
• My friends are busy because everyone just settled into post-vacation work flows and we're now gearing up for "The HoliDAZE."
• I'm so angry at myself for not remembering to prepare for my ANNUAL October crash.

TALKING about eating right and exercising IS NOT THE SAME AS DOING!

At least I had oatmeal for breakfast instead of an egg mcmuffin.

Vacation

It's amazing when the most important decision of your day is "what color bra should I wear under that shirt?" I haven't had to type anything or rewite anything or enter any Quickbooks. (Yes, I will have a stack of that when I return, but, ...)
I've been visiting family and friends this week and it's been fun. I chose the one friend a day patern instead of the group party I did last year.
I'm getting anxious because I'm not used to living without a car. Bloody inconvenient. But hey, that's why G-- made feet.

Ghostwriter

One of the interesting parts of my job is that my employer is a phenomenally talented acupuncturist. She has a great opportunity to share her knowledge with the world (she has a website, a blog, and is listed on numerous social networking pages). Unfortunately, English is her second language.
This is where I come in. We have an agreement that she will post something new to her blog every week. Before she can post it, I have to proofread it. What should take 15 minutes tops, took 5 hours today. I thought I had a handle on Five Element Theory but, OMG!, the nuance required to diagnose according to TCM makes memorizing the Merck catalog look like a simple parlor trick.